The depression spiraled out of control every time I tapped into the memory of what
used to be. Absolutely nothing seemed worthwhile as I spiraled toward a total loss
of direction and purpose.
My mind carried me further into a state of despair, seemingly controlled by outside
forces, as everything I held dear fell away. This experience was not new to me, but
this time, it was very different because absolutely everything changed. There was
not a morsel of my old life to cling to. My old comfortable life quickly disappeared
while experiencing health crises, job losses, financial stresses, and relationship
These changes really motivated me to change my life for the better. I began to realize
that my ego ruled, for whenever I experienced a lack of love, my mood was depressed
and anxious, anything but wholly joyous. And then I was reminded of the power within.
It is the power to change every aspect of life. I acknowledged this power and knew
it was finally time to change the way I thought and behaved.
It was time to trust in the process of growth, to have faith that I held the key
to life within me. I reviewed past experiences, recognized my role in them, and decided
my old way of thinking and feeling no longer served me. It was clear that the world
was changing quickly and past feelings of , discord, anxiety, turmoil, depression,
and futility, no longer suited me. They helped me to learn my lessons, but now that
their purpose was served, there was no room for them in my new life.
My focus rested on positive things as I did my best to ignore a fear-based reality.
I put the past aside and took responsibility for every aspect of my life. I cleaned
the slate by forgiving everyone who I thought might have harmed me. Eventually, I
asked them to forgive me for thinking out of line with the Self within. My life began
to improve as I lived in the moment appreciating what I had.
After forcing myself to walk though the doors of a spiritual living center, I recognized
that the only time I felt whole was when I connected with what many people refer
to as God or Spirit. This powerful presence is within all living things. I quickly
recognized it's the power I feel within.
Throughout the past few years, I've realized that we are playing a game here on earth.
We just agreed to forget for awhile. In Reality we are all the same. We are parts
of each other, parts of one perfect, loving, Whole. Feel into that essence for it
is the reality of the One within.
A variety of things helped me to change depression into joy. I placed potted and
flowering plants, pets and positive signs (such as "Life is Good") around me. No
matter where I am I fill my space with life-affirming music, read positive books,
paint, garden, build or create something, sing, dance, walk or do other exercise,
write about my experiences, meditate or sit still, while listening to soft music
without words. I've found it very helpful to avoid television and news and to fall
asleep to life-affirming music. Visit the Links section on the Lightworker's Log
Website for life-affirming ideas.
Shine on Bright Light :-)